I made it until the cemetery scene with only a single tear before I started having to hold my breath so I wouldn’t sob into my coat.
I made a few extra observations though like the fact that it felt like Sherlock was trying to push John away a few times but couldn’t keep the act up for long. (This is my cab, you take the next. I have something to do…alone ).
While John was at the therapist towards the end, she asks him (The things that you wanted to say that you didn’t say. Say them now. I can’t. ). John wanted to tell Sherlock how he was his best friend, how he honestly thought he was clever, more clever than anyone else, how he would never, could never, doubt him. (I loved him, more than I ever let on.) But he never said these things, words were boring to Sherlock, he thought he had shown him through actions, through following him everyone into the night, solving crimes, and hiding his cigarettes. He didn’t realize how much he had needed to say the words until it was too late. (I was so alone.)
At the cemetery, when John had to go and touch Sherlock’s tombstone, it was like he was searching for one last physical connection. He needed the closeness, even in death, as if he was expecting that single touch to erase everything and bring back his best friend.
And now that I am emotionally drained the night before classes start, I know that my mind will not be focused on bio tomorrow afternoon.